Gabriel's inferno

Year of release : 2020

 

Run time : 1h46min

 

Genre : ??? Romance I guess

 

 

The movie is based on a book trilogy by Sylvain Reynard.

 

The movie seems to be going by two titles,but I'm pretty sure I watched it called Gabriel's Rapture. But they say that wasn't released yet...

I'm gonna give spoilers as the movie was just awful !

The movie seems poorly written.

 

So,the guy is a professor. She's a student. They're broken up. They get back together. Apparently they broke up because he left her alone in an orchard to pick apples! He was hangover and strung out on coke.

Also,he's wearing bow ties,I hate them! They remind me of old people.

 

I find this movie very boring. It's just the two of them in this house or her room,telling sappy stories to each other.

The movie is not charming,it's not sexy nor appealing. Nothing ever happens !

 

This movie is worse than 50 Shades,at least 50 had s3x scenes ,good music,beautiful clothes and scenery,a lot of characters. This is just the two of them talking about their lives,IT'S BORING !

 

I can't believe the amount of stupidity in this movie! To let people feed you ,when you can feed yourself is stupid. I hate it. I can feed myself,thanx ! I hate chocolate cake.

Listen to this: he's shaming her for not wanting nor liking to let people literally feed her food. Apparently this means to be cared for . But she's not handicapped to be taken care of !

The man seems very selfish,full of himself .

 

The timeline is so wrong .They left school on daylight, she fell asleep while he was out buying food and woke up at night,when he served her food and then he literally put her to bed. How late was it?! That's all they did on that day?!

 

Also,these people are always eating . It's boring. If the books were exactly like this,that's awful,how did it sell,how did it get turned into a movie?!

 

Apparently this is a movie based on book 2.I don't know if there was a movie before this one,it felt like it. Thing is,these 2 didn't know anything about each other before this. So how were they together?

Even 50 Shades or Wild Orchid were movies about something! I've never watched a movie about absolutely nothing before ! Maybe it looks better in writing( but I doubt it!),not on screen though !

 

Everything evolves around them or him. Even when she's out with her only friend,she's at his lecture! Gabriel's !

 

They are obsessed with Dante's Inferno. I'm guessing the writer was. This subject bores me,and I'm sick of hearing about it.

 

And then I realized why it reminds me of 50 Shades.

This is a movie about nothing. They are always at his/her place and when they are out they are fighting because she is jealous of his exes who are always around him. He also dated a woman who's into S&M.

He has a pic of the two of them dancing at some party,but nobody knows they are together!

 

I can't believe someone thought this book was interesting enough to make movies based on it! The movie is so long and boring !Nothing ever happens, I cannot stress it enough!

She has orgasms from him massaging her feet!!

 

They are dating but it feels like they are at the beginning of the relationship,talking about what he wants and needs. Also,they never have s3x.

She is a virgin at the age of 23 years old. But she had a boyfriend. She's not innocent-her words-they did things! What those things were I wonder,because she said she didn't love him and the ex told her she's frigid!

 

This movie has no plot. I have no idea why were they broken up before ,what he did since their relationship is platonic.

 

The movie doesn't have any characters beside the leads. Paul doesn't count ,he appears twice!

Her birthday gift from him is a photo album with her pics. Gee,thanx!

 

The movie ended how it started. It feels like a series I'm not interested in watching. Even my life is more interesting and has more characters than this movie!

To give the sense of a plot or to keep the viewer interested it ended with her ex calling her! uugghh!!

 

The actors had no chemistry.

 

I think it's the worst movie ever made ,even the movie I considered the worst until now,even that one had a plot! Something was happening,they were going somewhere ! Not this one! 50 Shades of Gray, Wild Orchid, 9/5 weeks are gold compared to this (they don't have much of a plot either ,but they keep you interested with the funny business )

 

For those interested in this mess,the movie is on the streaming platform Passionflix.

 

Rating : The Horror, The Horror !!!